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May 2012 Newsletter
Smart Talk
Who is Audrey?

Media Blitz

Do Women talk more than men do? Fact or Fiction?

A popular myth and brunt of jokes is that women are the talkers; women talk more than men do. We hear terms such as Chatty Cathy or yakkity - yak when referring to women and how they can go on and on.

Actually, men get the floor more often, and when they get it, theykeep it longer. Women are also the recipients of more interruptions. One of the most extensive studies was conducted by linguists Don Zimmerman and Candace West (1975) , which demonstrated that men interrupted women much more than they interrupted other men and far more often than women interrupted either men or women (96 percent, compared with 4 percent). This conversational inequality has been slowly changing. There is new evidence that women are providing support to other women when they are interrupted, often saying something like, “ I ’ d like to hear the rest of her idea. ” In addition, rather than becoming silent when men interrupt them, more women are becoming assertive and requesting to finish (Bate, 1992 ). Mindell (1995) suggests that women build a repertoire of “ polite ways to say shut up. ” These are some of her recommendations:

Please . . .
Just a moment . . .
I’ m not finished . . .
Kindly hold the remarks till I' m done .. (p. 105).
Additional strategies might include, “ I would like to finish without interruption ” or “ John, I am almost done, please let me finish. ”

A final variable that affects who talks more is overlapping. Overlapping is when one person talks over another person; two people are talking at the same time. Bate says the motivation for men’s tendency to overlap is related to the viewpoint of“ dominance and power ” . In contrast, when women overlap, it usually serves the purpose of supporting or expressing interest. Women seldom overlap to assert control, but rather to build relationship and connection, revealing a more cooperative approach to conversation rather than a competitive one. Taken together, these variables contribute to women speaking less than men do. Some say women talk too much. If you have worked in Congress, you know that the fi libuster was invented by men. At your next Monday morning staff meeting, take notice.
Who is really doing more of the talking? Who is getting more of the airtime: men or women?

*Taken from Audrey's new book (co-author) The Gender Communication Handbook: Conquering Conversational Collisions Between Men and Women.

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Audrey Nelson PhD. is an international trainer, key-note speaker, consultant and author who works with organizations to increase their productivity and profitability through winning communication strategies.

Audrey is a member of the American Society of Training and Development and the Colorado Human Resource Association.

You can reach Audrey at
or at 303.448.1800 O -  303-448-1801 F - 303.448.1802 C

wiley pfeiffer
Gender Communication

The Gender Communication Handbook –
Conquering Conversational Collisions Between Men and Women

The Gender Communication Handbook
Audrey Nelson, Ph.D. and Claire Damken Brown, Ph.D.
Pfeiffer-An Imprint of Wiley
ISBN 978-1-118-12879-4

The Gender Communication Handbook is for anyone who works with the opposite sex. If you are a part of a management team, in HR, or develop corporate training, this book is a comprehensive guide filled with smart advice, extensive research, self-assessments, and compelling true-to-life case studies. This was written to clarify some of the many questions about gender, how the rules have changed and will help individuals thrive in a more increasingly diverse workplace and find a common language. Successful gender communication is a business mandate.

For more information and ordering, visit


arrowAmerican Society of Training and Development
International Conference
Denver May 6th -9th
Visit the Pfeiffer-Imprint of Wiley & Sons Booth
for the debut of Audrey's new book(co-author)
The Gender Communication Handbook

arrowSedgwick LLP
Your Generation or Mine:
From the Boardroom to the Courtroom

Wednesday May 9th 1 pm - 2 pm PST

Have you checked out Audrey’s blog?

From the Playground to the Battleground:
Where Women and Men Learn Conflict Styles

- Click for article

mens health


Audrey was interviewed for the May 2012 issue of
Men’s Health Magazine

Click here for article



Farm Credit
Farm Credit Council Services
Leadership Development Program
Victors without Victims:
Managing Conflict for a Positive Outcome

April 2012

Audrey was interviewed by Cosmopolitan for a June App for Guys which will be available mid-April - Pick Up a Woman Any Time: How to Read a Woman's Nonverbal Cues

Audrey has been asked to be the guest expert on communication and Code Switching for FOX 31 Denver
April 2012
He and She Themes in Conflict
Everyday Talk Show Fox 31
KDVR-TV, Denver
Click here for segment
March 2012
Can You Accept a Handout?
Everyday Talk Show Fox 31
KDVR-TV, Denver
Click here for segment
What People are saying about Audrey

Farm Credit Council Services
Leadership Development Program
April 2012 Omaha
Participants Comments-Interim Feedback Victors without Victims: Managing Conflict for a Positive Outcome:

I'm enjoying it. So many parallels I see working with co-workers as I see "working" with my kids.
Are you sure this isn't a parenting class? hahaha

Very good. Informative. Giving me tools I can work with.
Good open dialogue.
Great. Learning lots.
Great speaker. Easy to follow and understand.
Like real life examples.

NRU USFS Missoula

Hi Audrey, it was so great to see you this year and I truly enjoy the knowledge, vitality and personal experiences you bring to us at NRU every year. 

Charlotte Davey
USFS Northern Region
Office Automation Assistant
Public & Governmental Relations Staff

Women in Cable and Technology
Comcast University
Smart Talk

Dear Dr Nelson:
I wanted to write a quick note telling you how much I truly enjoyed your presentation today.  I wish it could have gone on a lot longer.  Everything covered in your presentation hit home.

Linda Holland

Colorado Human Resource Association
Spring Forum: Legal and Benefits
What Were They Thinking? Guidelines for Appropriate Workplace Behavior
Hello, Audrey!
I had the pleasure of sitting in on the Workplace Behavior presentation at yesterday’s CHRA Spring Forum, and it was TERRIFIC!

Have a great day,
Diane Johnston
Director, Human Resources
RIA Invision Sally Jobe
10700 E. Geddes Avenue, Suite 200
Englewood, CO 80112

Get your copy!

Code Switching: How to Talk so Men will Listen
Claire Brown Ph.D. and Audrey Nelson Ph.D.
Penguin Group-Alpha Books
ISBN 978-1-59257-926-6

Code Switching: How to Talk so Men will Listen is a hands-on tool for everyday use at the office. It is a practical resource with how-to steps to help businesswomen conquer the communication nuances between men and women in the workplace. This book explores the gender impact on business talk. It teaches using true stories and case studies, while providing valuable “code-switching” tips to help women gain and strengthen credibility and make a greater impact on the job

Code Switching Trailer Code Switching:
How to Talk so
Men will Listen -
book trailer

Click here to view
"Audrey's Top 4 CD Communication Hits"

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