Letting it all Hang Out: Watch Out for Emotional Predators
We all know an inappropriate self disclosure when we hear one because it is painfully uncomfortable to be on the receiving end not knowing what to do or how to continue the conversation. Too much information too fast and, often, in the wrong place or context like a routine Monday morning staff meeting. Occasionally, when I am conducting a training session, someone will make a revealing self disclosure and the audience becomes frozen. What do we do now that this bomb has been dropped? Where do I go from here?
One aspect of people who make these disclosures can be manipulative and predatory. It is human nature to mirror the level of intimacy revealed by someone else; responding in kind. So now that we have joined them in sharing personal and sometimes guarded secrets, they have the goods. They are not so innocent but emotional brokers who now posses information about you and can use it for manipulative purposes. It is a tactic referred to as forced teaming-an ill-advised intimacy. They can take this information and use it to exploit, humiliate, or control. Be aware, it can happen in a nano second at the water cooler.
Some preventative tips:
- The workplace is generally (some of us have friends for years at work we know we can trust-but not many!) not the arena to reveal private, personal information.
- Resist the urge to disclose when someone else is revealing an intimate anecdote.
- If you feel uncomfortable with what a person is sharing, follow that gut response. You can ask them if they are sure they want to continue or suggest the hall way at work is not the place to have this conversation
- Observe the person and how they use the information they have acquired about others.
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Audrey Nelson PhD. is an international trainer, consultant and author who works with organizations to increase their productivity and profitablility thorough winning communication strategies
You can reach Audrey at audrey@audreynelson.com
or 303-448-1800
Did you know that Audrey was invited by the editors at Psychology Today to participate as a gender communication expert on the Psychology Today blog . Check it out!
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in the world is Audrey? |
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Open to the public:
Business and Professional Women 91st Annual State Convention
Saturday June 5th
Hilton Garden Inn - Highlands Ranch
2010 State Convention Chair
O: 720-344-2153
Cell: 303-229-9935
Visit Audrey at her Code Switching booth
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Coming soon |
Look for upcoming article Four Step Plan: Code Switching Tips -
Phoenix Womens Magazine -
July-August 2010 -
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Did
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Browse
the archives of Audrey’s 2006 to date
Smart Talk Columns on her web!
Simply visit www.audreynelson.com
and click on “Newsletters.”
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 Audrey conducted an interview on Code Switching with:
VIA Times CPRTV Television, Chicago-
Channel 25 (5/18/10)
The only ethnic broadcast media founded and managed by a woman, Veronica Leighton, in North America,
VIA TIMES (VT) & CHICAGO PHILIPPINE REPORTS TV (CPRTV) serves the Filipino/Asian/Hispanic communities in Chicago
Everyday 10 am Talk Show (5/27/10)
KDVR/KWGN-TV -
Channel 2
“Women in the Headlines: Every Woman Can Learn Watching Clinton, Bullock, and Pelosi.
Dr. Audrey Nelson, Code Switching (5/19/10)
ABC 7, WLS-TV Chicago -
ABC Channel 7 is the Midwest flagship of the ABC television network
and home of the Oprah Winfrey Show
Dr. Audrey Nelson, Code Switching (5/18/10)
FOX Chicago, WFLD-TV -
Featured Audrey in a segment titled “Sex and the Salary.”
Audrey discussed the reasons why women make 77.89 cents to the dollar mane make and what women can do to level the playing the field.
Outlet: “Up Close and Personal” radio show (5/17/10)
Outlet Contact: Bonnie D Graham
Topic: Language of Relationships in 2010 -
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Audrey is featured as a Men’s Health magazine “expert advisor” in the May and June 2010 issues.“Talk Your Way Into Her Heart” May issue
- click here to view article
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Armin Brott alias “Mr. Dad”, is a Family & Parenting Columnist from the Bay area. He is also the host of the weekly radio show “Positive Parenting”. He interviewed Audrey April 13,2010 regarding the chapter From the Playground to the Bedroom from Code Switching.
ABC San Francisco ” View from the Bay” (2/24/10)
Code Switching -
Cleavage at Work? A New Dress Code for Professional Women (2/9/10) -
Mills College - San Francisco - |
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