What Happens When a Woman Acts Forcefully? The news is full of accounts and requests for women to be “fierce” and speak up. Easier said than done. Ask senior executive women. Many women move fast and gain the recognition due to simple metrics: they increase profits. A recent Lean In/McKinsey & Company survey of 132 companies and 34,000 employees found that women who negotiated for promotions were 30% more likely to be labeled intimidating, bossy and aggressive. The same old, same old, right? He is the boss and she is bossy. The same double edged sword and double standard. Bottom line, when women act forcefully, research suggests that men are more likely to react badly. Another variable to add into the equation is the ever constant unconscious bias that women need to be likeable. It is referred to as the likeability factor. Be nice, don’t rock the boat and smile a lot. Maybe that is why women more than men excessively smile? Finally, self-promotion (also known as selling yourself) is taboo for women but a necessity to rise to the C-suite. It is acceptable for men to mention their last big client they scored but not for her. Add to this mix that other women sometimes do not support women who are ambitious. What is a woman to do? A very tuff call! Did you miss one of the Smart Talk Columns? Browse the archives of Audrey’s 2006 to date- Smart Talk Columns on her web! Simply visit www.audreynelson.com and click on “Newsletters.

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Hello Audrey,

I work for AmeriGas Propane – we are a national distributor of propane. This year we have just launched a women’s group called Women’s Impact Network.  The propane industry is a male dominated industry and we are trying to achieve a better gender balance at AmeriGas. My colleagues have attended your workshops and I have read your books and we like your messaging around gender communication.  We think that would resonate with our group.  I wondered if you ever do any online webinars on this topic? Our geography makes a live event not practical. Please let me know?

A fan,

Justine Staub
Director, Communications
& Workforce Development
AmeriGas Propane

I’ve had the incredible opportunity to participate in two different sessions led by Audrey, the first event being a session hosted by the Leadership Initiative at the Denver Convention Center. This inspired our company’s women’s network to host a half-day workshop focused on He Speaks, She Speaks: What Different Things They Say for women in leadership. Audrey’s presentations are colored with great examples, and she is phenomenal at interacting with the audience in both keynote and workshop settings. She doesn’t just scratch the surface of communications concepts, but really dives in, imparting a wealth of knowledge and strategies in a short time. Even in an anomalous corporate culture, the topics Audrey covers are incredibly relevant. I love that I walked away with actionable steps and tips to improve my communication style and I’m confident that I will become a better influencer after participating in Audrey’s Women in Leadership workshop.  

–Beatrix K.

Thank you for the wonderful start to the week – I enjoyed the morning session and your keynote on Monday!  One of my best friends (and dearest colleagues) has often called me out on over-apologizing, but it wasn’t until I heard it in the video you played that it truly hit home.  I thought to myself, “is that REALLY what I sound like?”  Since then, I have caught myself apologizing a few times where a simple “excuse me” was appropriate – and this morning, I actually caught myself before I said anything and course-corrected in the moment.  Victory!  (Or at least one small step in the right direction!)

Regards,
Veronika

(employees from a leading investment services firm with more total assets than any publicly traded investment services firm in the U.S. 30.04 Trillion in client assests).

IMS Philadelphia A Women’s Guide to Leadership

• This course is great. Very engaging and informative.
• Very insightful and empowering. Full of good references and I am enjoying the examples and anecdotes.
• Great! Giving me a lot to think about. Excellent.
• Very interactive. Kept my attention the entire time!